This I Believe

This year, I was fortunate enough to be a part of Wheaton North's junior seminar class. It was a discussion-based course that led us to deeply think about our lives and our beliefs. Our final project was to write a short paper responding to the prompt, "This I Believe." What better way to start my blog than by sharing this? Here is my essay, encompassing all of my beliefs:

Are We There Yet?

            I believe that humans are always striving for something, and therefore I believe in the green light at the end of Daisy’s dock.

In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald introduces us to Jay Gatsby. Gatsby met a girl named Daisy years before the novel takes place and fell in love with her. When we meet him, he is living across the water from her, dreaming of seeing her again. His greatest and deepest desire is for them to be together. It’s what he strives for with every action he takes. Every party he throws is in hopes that she will turn up. Every dollar he bootlegs is to impress her when they finally meet. When Gatsby looks towards his desire, across the water to Daisy’s house, he sees a green light that flags the end of her dock. It’s very symbolic. It’s supposed to represent the accomplishment of that fantasy. If Gatsby reaches that light, he will have reached his ultimate goal. He would no longer have to strive for anything.

Now, I hated The Great Gatsby. I found the plot boring, the characters were all obnoxious, and the symbolism was excessive and tedious to analyze. But recently, I examined the idea of the green light again. Something about it stayed with me. Gatsby never did reach that light. He and Daisy never ended up together. He was just always reaching for her. If I apply that striving nature of Gatsby to all mankind, and I do, what do the green light and the dock represent for everybody?

The green light is, in general terms, that underlying thing that every human is striving for. Your greatest fantasy, your biggest dream, your deepest and most outrageous goal. The dock is your life. It represents the choices you make and the actions you perform every day that show just what it is you desire so deeply. Everyone’s green light is different. Everyone’s green light is a big idea that gives a purpose to everything they do.

I believe no one is meant to reach their green light. It is impossible to reach. It’s supposed to be impossible to reach. It is the step above where each person is supposed to be. Everyone is striving for this green light their whole life. On their “path,” or, the dock, they can reach many high points, they can be happy, they can be successful, they can reach many if not all of their smaller goals. But this light is the reason why no one is ever fully satisfied with where they are. As a human race, we’re always trying to move forward. Everyone has to keep striving for something because it gives life purpose and meaning. It’s also the reason why there is no perfect human being. You can always improve yourself because you can always strive for more, because you’ll never have reached the end of the dock.

I guess it sounds kind of discouraging to say that we can never reach our ultimate goal, but I don’t mean it as a negative. I think if we didn’t always have something ahead of where we are, we wouldn’t see any reason to try to be a better person. Just because we can’t reach perfection doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try to get as close as possible. Just because we can’t fully achieve our deep desire doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try and accomplish as many wonderful goals in our lives that we can.

My green light is world peace. It’s that outrageous, deep desire that I have, that I reach for. I want to help everyone in need. I don't ever realistically expect to reach it. I don’t think I’ll see total world peace in my lifetime, nor do I think I can help every single person in need, but that doesn't make me feel hopeless or discouraged. That doesn’t make me stop helping those that I can. It makes me continue to strive for it with every action.

One day, towards the beginning of fourth grade, I went to school just like normal, and our class sat down for a discussion. One of my classmates had seen the news that morning. He had seen the destruction of the twin towers by al-Qaeda’s suicide plane crashes. I was nine years old and I was in total shock. I could not understand why anyone would do something like that on purpose. That night I told my mom I wanted to help New York City and all the people in need. We decided to raise money for The Red Cross by making and selling red-white-and-blue ribbons. When I look back on this situation, I find it interesting that I said, “I want to help all those people in need.” I didn’t help everyone. There were hundreds I’m sure that never saw a cent of the money I raised. If I had been asked, I’m sure I would have known that I wasn’t helping everyone. However, if I had then been asked, “Then why bother?” I would have replied, “Well, how could I not do this? How could I not do everything I can to help as many as possible?” Now I understand that my green light was to bring peace to the situation, and help everyone, and that’s what I was thinking when I began the ribbon-making business. Just because I didn’t help absolutely everyone doesn’t mean I didn’t do some good. And the green light is still there to keep me fighting for peace in other situations.

I feel there would be little purpose in my life if I just stood still on the dock. So I’ll keep heading towards that green light, and I’m going to get close as I can.